Laughter makes everything better with your partner, and my guest, Chris Duffy, has written a book about how to have a better sense of humor.
Today, you’ll hear the 3 core pillars Chris outlines:
- Notice things. Be present. (Look for the odd, wacky, and awkward things: they’re funny.)
- Laugh at yourself. (My biggest laugh in the book was how a realtor described his living situation.)
- Take social risks. (He tells a super funny story about his time on LinkedIn, and why his account got shut down…eventually.)
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Connecting with your partner
Mostly, though, Chris’s book—Humor Me—is about connecting with other human beings and using laughter to do it.
Did you know there’s a scientific reason we bond with laughter? One scientist explained it to Chris this way: When we laugh, it’s typically because something surprises or delights us. Laughter is like the key to a puzzle that’s locked away.
When I laugh at your story, we’re bonded by that lock-and-key moment. Short story: laughter tells us we belong to each other.
More things you’ll hear in this episode
- You’ll hear Chris talk about the simple—but not so easy—way to build your sense of humor.
- Chris will talk about why we sometimes wince when we laugh: the dark side of humor.
- He’ll give you ideas for making your life seem longer and fuller: collect things that make you laugh, and share them with groups of people you love.
I loved talking to Chris. He’s so good at being a better human. You’ll hear his earnest desire to be more kind and how you can use your sense of humor to feel closer to the people you love.
And if you get his book on Audible, you’ll hear how a friend saved him when he stumbled introducing himself, “Me name is Chris.” The new friend adopted a pirate voice, “Ahoy Chris!” This was one of my favorite moments in the book. I can’t wait to know if you laugh out loud like I did.
Try this:
Chris and his wife, Mollie, have a daily habit (he’s quick to say, “We don’t get it done every day; but that’s the aim”): they each collect things that make them laugh, then share those things at the end of the day for 5-10 minutes.
How great is this for reframing your day? When you’re on the lookout for, “What’s funny?” everything goes better, right? You don’t mind that your colleague is late, because you had time to notice the bright blue bird. So blue. So pretty. Then, as you’re admiring its lovely wings, the blue bird poops and the poop makes you giggle.
How different would your life be if you and your partner traded moments of laughter each day?
Connect with Chris Duffy
Chris Duffy is an award-winning comedian, television writer, and radio/podcast host. Chris currently hosts the hit podcast How to Be a Better Human. You can watch his comedic TED talk, “How to find laughter anywhere” online. He has appeared on Good Morning America, ABC News, NPR, and National Geographic Explorer. Chris wrote for both seasons of Wyatt Cenac’s Problem Areas on HBO, executive produced by John Oliver. He’s the creator/host of the streaming game show Wrong Answers Only, where three comedians try to understand what a leading scientist does all day, in partnership with LabX at the National Academy of Sciences. Chris is both a former fifth grade teacher and a former fifth grade student.
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