What kills a fun time faster than anything else? Someone who doesn’t want to be there.
Not everyone has fun in the same way. When you understand what’s fun for you, it’s easier to ask your partner if they want to join you in having your kind of fun. Today we’ll talk about 6 types of fun (but there are plenty of others).
- Fall into Flow
- Bolt of Joy
- Contentment
- Fidgeting
- Something Messy
- Something Clean
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Fun has different flavors
You can titrate the fun you have with your partner by sometimes doing things together, and other times you can cut your partner loose to have their own kind of fun so you can do the same.
Think about yourself as I describe each type of fun. Do you like this type of fun? Does your partner? Who do you know that thinks this flavor of fun is fun? Who do you know that thinks this flavor of fun is yucky?
The key elements of fun
And, as we talk about fun, I want to review my number one rule for relationship happiness: Stay in your own business.
When you stay in your own business, you FEEL the fun. When you’re not in your own business—say you’re wondering if your partner is having fun—your attention is diverted. You can’t feel your own fun because you’re worried about someone else’s fun. Fun is better when you stay in your body, feel your own feels, and let your partner see your happiness.
Happiness, after all, is contagious.
Try this:
This week’s habit for your happily ever after is to create or refine one flavor of fun that is fun for you.
Do you want to borrow from my 6 types of fun?
- Find the Flow
- A Bolt of Joy
- Contentment
- Fidgeting
- Messy fun
- Clean fun
Or do you have an entirely different flavor of fun that I have missed?
Date Night Discussion
This week I invite you to tell your partner about a specific sort of fun you want to put into your life. My invitation is to either:
- Invite your partner to share some fun with you, or
- To describe the sort of fun you want to have on your own or with a friend.
Consider this date night discussion a chance to either issue a clear invitation to your partner or to announce that you want to go have fun alone, but you promise to return and bring a whole bunch of happiness home with you.
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