Habits for Happily Ever After

This class will (re)define your marriage:
  • You want to have a marriage filled with trust: a home base where you feel safe showing up exactly as you are.
  • You want a partner who will build a life with you: sharing the work load and life’s celebrations.
  • And you want passion: sex that is exciting and also tender.

Invest in the lifetime of your marriage. You pour energy, planning, and money into your wedding day, but what about investing in the marriage you long to create for a lifetime?

This class will (re)define your marriage:

Habits for Happily Ever After

  • You want to have a marriage filled with trust: a home base where you feel safe showing up exactly as you are.
  • You want a partner who will build a life with you: sharing the work load and life’s celebrations.
  • And you want passion: sex that is exciting and also tender.

Invest in the lifetime of your marriage. You pour energy, planning, and money into your wedding day, but what about investing in the marriage you long to create for a lifetime?

Looking for a way to secure your relationship longterm?

It was a relief to hear Rebecca voice aloud the struggles I face in my marriage. She shared stories I could relate to. Through her course, she provided realistic strategies to face these struggles and to take responsibility for what I bring into my marriage.

Diana Crabtree GreenCPA, Founder of Buck the Budget

Start Right

You’re new to marriage (or you’re in a forever relationship) and you want to start right.
You know that habits form unconsciously. You want careers and kids, a house and a 401K, but how do you balance it all? You know that intentional habits will make an enormous difference, so you want to start your marriage right.

Life is great, but you want to be ready if/when challenges come.
The one thing you know is that life won’t always be easy. You want to establish strong habits that will allow you and your sweetheart to grow closer so you are a united team when hard times arrive. You know that good communication doesn’t happen by accident and you want to learn concrete skills so you can be friends and share secrets forever.

The sex is great now, but you want to continue to be attracted to each other in the decades to come.
You’ve heard tons of people tell you to enjoy the romance now because it will fade. You don’t need to have butterflies each time you see your spouse from now to eternity, but you want to cultivate habits that will keep you feeling madly in love for the lifetime you expect to spend together.

Reset Your Relationship

You love your partner but it’s time to hit the reset button.
You’ve fallen into some bad habits. You nag. You keep score: and your partner never measures up. You want to feel like you’re on the same team again, ready to conquer the world together. You know you can do better, but you need a kickstart.

You want to stop feeling like this is the end
Every time there’s conflict you have this sinking feeling: this is the beginning of the end. Your relationship is beginning to look like your parents’ and you don’t like what you see. You want to rewrite the script that keeps playing with each argument. You love your spouse, but you need some tools to handle conflict with more grace.

The spark is gone and you feel invisible
You know you love each other, but daily life is mundane. You’re bored, or worse, you’re feeling bitter, lonely, or resentful. You don’t have to go back to the butterfly feeling when you dated, but you’d like to feel excited again about having sex.

Rebecca’s class helped us find new ways to reliably connect. Before HHEA, we were taking each other for granted, but we learned to notice each other more deeply. We pay more attention to the small, everyday moments we share.

Alice Whitaker and Ryan PascoBoston, Massachusetts

Help for couples who want to grow close for a lifetime.

Want to trust more and lean into a relationship with your spouse? This class will offer you habits to connect. It doesn’t matter what stage of marriage you’re currently in; what matters is that you are willing to examine the habits you have (or don’t have) and make changes. Click on the course overview below to see all topics we’ll cover.

The class was easy to navigate and well organized with plenty of visual and written resources to refer back to along the way. Rebecca continues to be an incredible coach and source of wisdom in our lives.

Shannon & Patrick MarklandSebring, Florida

This is the kind of course you'll want to go back through. I've been going back to classes from just 2 months ago and I'm still learning new things because our circumstances are different now than they were then.

Anonymous2020 Class Participant

Why Habits for Your Happily Ever After?

The common denominator with all my clients has been relationship struggles. I’m a master certified coach working privately since 2011.

It didn’t matter why they were coaching with me—clutter clearing, career expansion, writing, or fitness—eventually the relationship subject would arise. The subject was always broached with head hanging low. Every single person was ashamed of the struggles they were having in their primary relationship. And they were certain they were the only one.

  • A manager who could run a fabulously articulate meeting but couldn’t talk to her spouse.
  • A couple whose daily argument was, “What’s for dinner?”
  • A couple who still loved each other, but it had been more than a year since they’d had
    sex.

The hidden shame in my clients lives matched my biggest interest: What makes relationships work? And why do we all struggle with the same things?

This class is a co-creation with my clients, which means I’ve seen these tools work to heal relationships.

You will realize you’re not the only one whose struggling. And you’ll get tools to help you connect with your sweetheart.

I took Rebecca’s Happily Ever After class with my husband two years into our marriage. Not only was her facilitation practical, it was the perfect level of personal and approachable.

I learned to look at myself and my partner’s tendencies and needs in new ways, and built skills to support those new findings throughout Rebecca’s classes.

I also really loved the ‘cohort’ model, and found it helpful to both learn from and see other couples navigating their communication challenges. All in all, I found Rebecca’s class to be highly relatable, and an easy commitment with deep roots that will help my relationship find more harmony and connection for years to come.”

Lindsey DavisSalt Lake City, Utah

How Does the Class Work?

Your year of creating simple habits to improve your marriage will be divided into four units. There will be time off in between units to integrate and practice the habits you’ve learned.

Unit 1 Marriage 101 This unit addresses the typical pitfalls in relationships and how to avoid falling into them. This class provides the foundation for the following three units.

Units 2-4: Partner, Friend, Lover These units explore the three relationships inside your singular marriage. Each relationship comes with different expectations and you will understand why getting clear about these expectations will help avoid conflict and build connection. You’ll also create habits to strengthen each of these three relationships.

4 Units

Information has been broken into 4 units with time for you to integrate what you learn.

Practical

Actionable habits are individualized so they work for your unique relationship. Workshops meet Tuesday evenings 4pm PST/7pm EST.

40+ Videos

Clear concepts are presented with stories & graphics so they are easy to digest.

Worksheets

Simplified concepts prompt important discussions between you and your spouse.

Individualized

Opportunities for you to receive personalized attention to untangle the unique struggles you face.

Lifetime Access

This allows you to move at the pace you need with the confidence you won’t miss out if you can’t “keep up.”

This course clarifies the actions steps to get your marriage back on track. I love your course and believe it is knowledge not presented in other marriage topics or podcasts I listen to.

Araceli Gomez

Save the Dates

Unit 1 Marriage 101 – March 22-April 19
Unit 2 Partner – May 10-31
Unit 3 Friend – August 23-September 13
Unit 4 Lover – November 1-22

Videos and worksheets are available in the virtual classroom at the start of each new week to explore on your own time.

Workshops meet Tuesday evenings on Zoom to support your individualized needs.
4pm Pacific/7pm Eastern

Rebecca's class has reawakened our marriage. We have young kids and most times, it feels like we are on autopilot day to day. Through taking Habits for Your Happily Ever After we became aware of who were we showing up as in our relationship. By bringing this awareness back, we have been able to work on our communication skills and pull ourselves out of what has felt like a fog of monotony in our marriage. I can't think of any marriage that would not benefit greatly from taking Rebecca's class. Her honesty, humor and tenderness is a true gift as a teacher.

Betsy FryMarried for 10 years

I am Rebecca Mullen and the thing I’m most proud of in my life is my marriage.

My husband and I met in junior high school so we grew up together and navigated a lot of changes. We’ve been through big adventures like flipping a raft in the icy waters of the Alsek River in Alaska. And we’ve comforted each other during several family deaths including my mother, step-father and brother. We have struggled financially for years, and, later, we learned to invest together.

Why am I proud? This is not the same marriage we started with. I would say that our marriage died twice and we managed to find something new in the ashes of the old. During those resurrections of our love we both had to grow. I noticed I was pretty controlling and he realized how important it is to me that he communicate. It’s been a wild ride, far more frightening than that raft flip and lonelier, at times, than losing my mom.

I made a vow after my parents’ divorce, that I would create a whole family. Have you heard the life-mastery phrase: do one, see one, teach one? I searched out every resource I could find to help me understand what it takes to make a relationship work during the difficult times as well as the times of joy. I’ve been practicing see one for 50 years. I’ve been in the do one phase of marriage for more than three decades. Now I’m eager to share with you what I’ve learned, and I want you to join me as I teach one.

I’m a raving fan. I’m telling my friends to take the course. And I told Rebecca to raise her price.

Dianna Crabtree GreenGrand Junction, Colorado

What Topics Does the Class Cover?

Do you want to continually grow closer to your mate over the course of a lifetime? Habits for Your Happily Ever After is all about the practical habits that minimize problems and maximize joy.

We’ll cover the following topics. Click on one to learn more.

Learn how to avoid disappointments and keep promises.

Expectations. You get disappointed because you have expectations and they aren’t met. Learn when expectations are helping: “You will shop and I will cook.” An expectation like this avoids both of you coming home with a mountain of groceries. But we all have invisible expectations. You’ll comfort me when I cry. I’ll change the tires on your car. These invisible expectations can get us into trouble. Learn to see expectations you didn’t know you had, and understand how those expectations set you up for success or failure.

There’s a difference between alone and lonely. How can you cultivate connection and retain your individuality?

Friendship. You want to feel understood by your spouse. Marriage is more fun when you feel you have a confidant to keep you company after a bad day. When you don’t feel understood you get guarded and uptight. This can cause your relationship to get stiff or formal and you stop sharing secrets or withhold information. Moments when there is a lack of understanding happen in life, so it’s good to learn habits that guide the return of relaxation and ease. When you can laugh together you’ll feel more bonded.

Ever heard yourself say, “It’s easier if I just do it myself.” But secretly, you wish you had help?

Partnership. You want to feel safe with your spouse. Marriage eases the stress when you know you’ve got a teammate who will rescue you when your car breaks down.
When you don’t feel safe you worry who’ll help when trouble arises. Insecurity in your relationship can cause you to feel like things aren’t fair and you’ll keep score of little things or get greedy when it comes to sharing. If you’re going to spend your life together you’ll certainly face a few troubles, so it’s good to learn habits that will anchor you as teammates so you face problems together. You’ll feel energized and fulfilled when you accomplish life together.

You love your spouse, and you want to cultivate a good sex life.

Lovers. You want to feel wanted by your spouse. Marriage lubricates life’s tiny stresses when you are well anchored in affection and have a passionate partner. When you don’t feel wanted passion dies and you get bored or begin to look elsewhere. Resentments build easily and you look at other relationships with envy. Life will be boring at times so it’s important to cultivate habits that feed your zest for life. You’ll feel confident when you approach
life as a shared adventure. And where adventure and zest are alive and well, there is always more sex.

You ask and ask, but your partner doesn’t get it.

Communicate. You want communication to be easy. We love each other, so this shouldn’t feel like work, right? Well… the love you feel is filled with all sorts of invisible expectations as I’ve already mentioned. Almost every couple says to me, “We need to communicate better,” but what does that mean? You’ll learn to listen with gentle purpose and develop habits to help you reveal what didn’t feel like it needed to get said. When you feel heard and you are able to talk comfortably, the little gremlins that haunt your relationship have no where to hide and connection is easier.

You know your partner loves you, but you don’t feel like your relationship is their priority.

Prioritize. Your want to feel like you are a priority in your mate’s life. Sometimes your spouse says you’re a priority but you don’t feel like a priority. You know that prioritizing your mate is key. But how do you make your actions reflect your intentions? Knowing you matter isn’t the same as feeling like you matter. You’ll learn habits that, when repeated, make your spouse feel important to you and you’ll be able to identify habits your partner can practice that lets you know that you matter to them.

You used to find your partner so attractive. Lately, you only see them in stained sweatpants.

Attract. You want to know your mate is attracted to you and you want to feel attracted to them. But after a long work week you just want to spend the weekend in your
jammies watching TV. What is the value of attraction? Are you shallow if you think your spouse looks good for everyone but you? How can you make sure you’ll be more attracted to your spouse the longer you live together? Learn gentle habits so you can increase the attraction you feel.

Invest in growing toward one another. Join the class and learn habits that will nurture your happily ever after.

Get Started Now

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This personal growth class was created based upon my years as a coach working with couples as well as decades of research. As with any personal growth, the critical factor is you: The effort, time and dedication you put in. I am not responsible for you success: Your success is based on you showing up for yourself. Neither am I responsible for your failure: You won’t change if you don’t engage. I promise to provide you with a great toolbox filled with insight and practical habits. These students agree that they were happy with the results they obtained.