How do two people go from meeting in a Dairy Queen as teenagers, to cultivating a connection so deep that their marriage can withstand a major life change?
Today we get to hear from my niece and nephew, Chris and Megan Tidd. They are childhood sweethearts, and they’ve been together 23 years. During those years, they’ve raised two wonderful children and, in addition to careers as engineer and teacher, they’ve both gotten graduate degrees. You’ll hear how they:
- Pay attention to their monthly “anniversor” to remind them of the commitment they made to each other
- You’ll hear how they deal with the *opposites attract* element in their relationship to form a helix of interconnection
- And why acknowledging the Hole Megan was feeling in her heart is crucial to furthering that connection
Celebrate your relationship to keep your connection alive
Life is busy. Especially when you’re married and you’re building a family of your own.
Chris and Megan have experienced this just like every other couple, so how do they maintain their relationship?
Every month on the 23rd, Chris and Megan celebrate their “anniversor.” They make sure to share a cup of coffee and exchange a few words. They keep it simple. Acknowledging the day is enough.
Making time to acknowledge and celebrate your commitment to your partner brings you closer. If you do it frequently, it helps sustain your relationship through the hectic times when you have to balance having young kids and a career.
Try this:
For this week’s habit for your happily ever after, I’m wondering if you have a desire to mark your “anniversor?”
If you had a monthly rhythm to acknowledge your vows of commitment, what would it be? What question would draw you back to your sweetheart over and over?
Big decisions impact your happily ever after
Megan realized that her children had filled her life with the purpose of relationships and intimacy. Now they didn’t need her as much.
But she’d fallen in love with that feeling of human connection and purpose.
When she told Chris she wanted to go to medical school even though their children were 13 and 15. He was skeptical.
Chris was able to challenge Megan to think practically: How will we pay our bills? Megan was able to validate how much Chris’s accepting and loving nature had meant to her personal growth: She wanted more of the sort of purpose in her own life she saw evident in his.
They learned to come together, each thinking like the other. But they also retained their own strengths.
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Opposite qualities create the helix of connection
Megan and Chris credit their strong connection to their commitment to come together.
“We see the world differently,” says Megan as she held her arms apart. “But our commitment is to look at any situation through the eyes of the other.” Her hands come together. “Over the years we’ve gotten so good at this that we sometimes over-correct.” Now her arms cross.
Then the whole thing begins again, her arms swerving back and forth in the cone of a twirling helix.
Megan has learned to value those qualities in Chris that just let her feel loved. And accepted. No solutions required. Chris has learned the value of change-making that Megan presents with solutions and options.
How about you?
How are you and your sweetheart different? Do you differences cause conflict, or do they help you build a bridge of connection?
Text me at 970-210-4480 and let me know.
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