158: How to Be Your Own Life Coach Part 4: What’s Your Takeaway?

When anyone new starts coaching with me, they want immediate results. Even if the problem they walk into my door was created over 10 years, they want me to fix it…now. Today. In a 90-minute session.

That’s not how rock-solid coaching works and I don’t even really believe that is what you want.

You don’t want a flimsy relationship that can be shifted by a fly-by-night coach offering the latest quick-fix for your relationship. Why not? Because think how shallow the roots are on that fix. The next big wind (or your next big conflict) will blow over any shallowly-rooted-relationship.

This week, I’m offering you the framework that I use in my private coaching. It includes 4 key elements:

• Celebrate
• “Good to notice”
• Tools and invitations
• The Take-away

I’ll release one episode each day that covers a part of the framework. Three days ago, we concentrated on celebration. Two days ago, I told you about why it’s “good to notice.” Yesterday, I shared some of the many tools that I offer my clients in our coaching sessions. In this episode, I’m talking about the final part of my framework: What’s your takeaway?

#4: The Takeaway

As humans, we all like to have the safety of a routine. So I end every session the same way. “What are you taking away from today’s session?” I ask my client. This signals that our time is almost over. It gives their nervous system a chance to recalibrate. They often take a deep breath before answering.

When we’ve done anything hard, it’s nice to have a comforting routine to ease you back into the rest of your day.

I recommend this practice for all kinds of moments in life

• When you leave a meeting, ask yourself, “What am I taking away from that meeting?”
• When you’ve had a great time sharing drinks with your friends, ask yourself a slightly different version of the question, “What was my favorite part of that outing?”
• When you’ve had a bumpy encounter with your toddler, ask yourself, “What did I just learn about myself? Or about my toddler?”

My hope is that this question will help you navigate the bumpy moments in your life. When you’ve had something wonky happen, let this question help you find your equilibrium again.

“What am I taking away from this situation?” is a great way to wake up your agency. It’s an empowering question. It’s a reflective question. It’s meant to be a gentle, full-of-permission question.

Do you want to coach with me?

I have open spots in my private coaching practice. That doesn’t happen very often, so I’d love to extend that invitation to you if you’ve been wanting to coach with me.

Reach out via my text number, 970-210-4480, or you can go to this page on my website. I can’t wait to get to know you.

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